When you are too needy and too commited to the deal?

We all grow up in “finish the task and be happy” society. From the beginning of our life we bind completing the job as a happy event, so we sometimes try to complete it as soon as possible. It’s what our parents told us – finish the homework first and after that you can go out and play with your friends. Many of us moved this scheme to negotiations territory which is a very dangerous thing to do.

You are afraid you are too commited and too needy? First of all, you have to put yourself in other side shoes and think what is in their head. If they see you are very needy and you can do anything as soon as possible to get the deal done, they will postpone it to get more pluses and profits from them. Think for a while if the other part is not already taking advantage of you rushing with time. You might not see clearly what you can loose at this time, but think about a simple typical scenario – a couple who needs to move to a new city and they must sell the old house as soon as possible. They want to get things done and move with their life, but we can be pretty sure that they will end up getting much lower price for their house. Instead of rushing to close the deal, try start looking for more alternative options. Think in a longterm way, not in emotional way.

Escalations of commitment often occurs in emotional situations, especially with a bit of competition like auctions, custody battles or acqusitions by enemy company. Sometimes it’s good to take some time-off to realise that you already invested too much time on this talks. That all is going nowhere forward your target and you can only end up in disappointing deal, especially if you push yourself too much forward into it. It’s good to sit down and compare the two sides of commitment, so you would not trap yourself with very binding agreement for you and almost no binding for the other side.

Analyze what would happen if you stand up and go away from the negotiations. You always have the right to change your mind. Some people will say that you are inconsistent, but everyone has a right to change their mind. It’s better to say few words like “I was wrong, it was my mistake, I am not interested in this anymore” than to accept bad agreement which will make you umiserable for a very long period of time.

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